Monday, March 17, 2008

Legalize It! Or How many dreams must die?

AAAAhhhhhhhhrrrrg. So now you know that something is up. (Ya I know it's getting old but it's the only thing original here.)

Anyways...PROSTITUTION! No, I'm not talking about weed which should have been legalized long ago but prostitution. I'm all for it. Now that is not to say that I want my daughter or yours to be the one who becomes a hooker but let's be realistic.

Guys get married because they want some good loving from someone they are attracted to and who they get along with. Women get married for security and status and to have fathers for their children. Personality and questionable habits notwithstanding a la Karla Homolka.

Before you get all bent, here's another -screw you and your true love bullshit. The fact of the matter is we are social animals who are born, grow old and die, just like any other animal. We mate. Get the picture? Take any woman out of her country, drop her somewhere else in the world and make her stay. She will eventually find someone and have children. That's what they do. They find a man and get pregnant. Unless they're lesbians in which case this does not apply. It's not a judgement, it's a fact. No I'm not absolving them of the faculties to make a decision on who and how etcetera, I'm illustrating the fact that she will fall in love 100 times or more in the same city given the chance. So your true love, in the stars, soul-mate may exist but women often settle for what's available and go from there.

What I mean is that when poor old hard-working, self-abnegating hubby comes home and doesn't measure up to Prince Charming's standards of always looking neat and clean, no stubble whatsoever and a body like a rock, disillusioned-wifey starts in with the verbal abuse. Yes, that is what it is. When a man yells at a woman it's abuse, when a woman picks at a man in an ever increasing tone of voice, that is abuse too. Women are good at talking, the trick is getting them to shut up most of the time. We just don't say that as it is not worth the cost in the downtime consisting of having it explained explained in detail, ad-nauseum just how wrong we are and how ashamed we should feel. Men are good at hitting things but we have been unfairly gelded. Now that they don't have to worry about any NEGATIVE repercussions, women have basically invented the new male. Oh and the attention and sympathy they get.....

The new male is an accessory, like a handbag, sure it requires a little maintenance but on the whole another paycheck can be worth it...temporarily. Someone to fix the car and mow the lawn and co-sign on loans but when it comes to spending, look-out! That's a subject like fat. We know it's there but it's hell to get around. Don't make enough money and she'll rub it in your face in 1000 different ways but you have to sit and listen or take a walk. Some things require a good smack in the mouth. Some people go too far not knowing when to shut up. Unfortunately there is no recourse but divorce. And we all know it's cheaper to keep her.

If women get married for security and affection, guys get married for sex and food, in that order respectively. Ask yourself why women should get an ongoing stipend of "security" from the man and not be required to give up a comparable proportion of pie for the poor disenfranchised sap she's taking to the cleaners. Then at least it would be comparatively distasteful for both parties. Long has it been shown that women will crawl under many things for money. I say, call their bluff. Make them work for it like the other working girls. If she brings nothing, let her keep it. If she works for it, give her a suitable proportion. If she gave up her job for him following him all over creation... well let me give you the advice I got from one of my ex's when I told her that I had given up everything for her and built my life around her and assumed all her debt for consolidation under my own name,"You're not supposed to." She didn't stop me, but she didn't agree with it. It was ok for her, so there was no noise made. When it was done, she left. Ask me for sympathy. I can direct you to it, but you can't get there from here.

I say yes, restructure society and restore the balance of power. Make prostitution legal. I know it seems far fetched but it would solve quite a few problems and under no illusions would cause quite a few as well.

What I do think is likely to happen under the correct circumstances and management is:
1) Men as a general rule will have a legal, safe non-shameful way to get their pent up tension taken care of without being trapped in a dangerous "booty-call" arrangement that often turns into a baby-daddy arrangement. Either that or a "Sir, you have (fill in disease here).

2) Contrary to popular belief, while I wouldn't stick my face in there I don't think they are all suicidal. I think that many of the somewhat upscale hookers are definitely trying to ensure their continued success. Herpes, AIDS, Yeasties can all have detrimental effects on their earning ability. Obviously, if you pick yourself a five dollar crack whore, you have a greater chance of catching something really undesirable. The point I'm trying to make is, being hookers, they know about protection and will make sure you use it or pay an exorbitant premium. I'd take the condom thanks and a shower or two.

Consider this, most rapists and sexual assault perpetrators are low education, blue-collar or no job, single males, followed by married males. Give the single males a break. Some of them are right ugly or undesirable in some way. Don't they have the right to have their salads tossed? How can the government, many of whom have been caught with their hands in the cookie jar themselves(http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/afp/us_politics_newyork_governor_prostitution), legislate their celibacy?

Think about it for a moment,


...my friend here wants to get laid. So taking him to a club is a write off. Taking him to a really bad gay club is a write off too and that is tough. What to do, what to do. Well what we can say is that if he can control his urges, great! Wonderful and love and joy permeate the earth. However, if he can't, someone dies or gets irreversibly damaged but for our sensibilities. I submit to you that if he had a means of getting even the slightest piece of trim no matter how meager and minging, without rejection, he'd jump at it! Maybe even go so far as to get a job to support the habit. All good. Buy some teeth, even better.


I also beg your attention to my other friend here,





his new girlfriend, has been getting tighter and tighter with the cooch lately. For a while now she has been telling him everything that is wrong with him while changing into an emotional basketcase because her father has started beating his wife again and the dog died. All of a sudden, the cost/profit balance ( no I'm not equating sex with the entire experience, I use it like a canary in a coalmine) is all messed up. Like the old joke goes, a headache that lasts more than a week is a serious medical condition and should be treated as such.



My friend has some choices, limited though they may be. First, and most likely - he understands that he is no Brad Pitt. At this age and in this condition, if he kicks her to the curb, that is most likely it for his love life. N'est pas? If trollops are available life's not so bad, if not good, livable. What's likely to happen is, get hitched to the screaming banshee and hope that someday she slips and you get a glimpse up her skirt while she gathers her wits.
What to do, what to do. Since hookers aren't available, he does his best and finally hooks up with some ditch-pig, pin-cushion who will gift him with a dose of something vile and virulent to take home to his loving wife. Six painful weeks later they both have something awful, she gets the assets, he dies alone.



And the nonsense about it being nontaxable - licences and jail terms. Yes that would make the government pimps but it would save them a lot in unwanted babies and unwed mothers as well as keeping sexual offences down and lowering the disease incidence rate while creating jobs.

As I said, I don't want my daughter or yours doing it but reality must be honored if we are to make things right. It is the oldest profession for a reason, and no amount of arrests will take away the need for male sexual outlet. What it does do is promote ill-advised marriages and encourage the proliferation of kids having kids. Let your 19 year old son try to pull the "Don't worry I won't get you pregnant." line with a seasoned streetwalker. She'd send him home with his tail, dick, wallet and dignity between his legs. Sorted.

You may think I haven't considered it but common-sense says it isn't going away unless you start sewing peoples legs together and that makes it tough to hold down a regular job. All you would do is create a whole mess of "psychic friends". Legislate it, regulate it, tax it like a sin tax (sounds like a rap song) and stop your bullshit. Fix the problem from the stem. Everyone can sneak around or just let it go and get on with life.

Newsflash: any of us could die in the next moment, it is too bad we must make people pay eternally when they only learn incrementally. One bad decision and your whole life crumbles. It works both ways. If you are hooking, you are almost definitely making more than you would selling any other type of fish. If that is the trade off you have come to then so be it. Be informed, work with friends, don't get high, be careful, save your money, get an education and get the fuck out before it destroys you. Don't have kids while you are hooking, that's not fair. If you already have them and this is what you have to do, remember why you made that choice and get yourself up and out of it pronto. They deserve that much. You need to give them that chance.

Remember, when they have no other toys, kids will play with their genitals and put them together and then all the support in the world won't be able to stop them from making a life changing decision either way. Why not let them test drive some demo sportsters before investing in the family sedan and then the inevitable minivan (shudder). Give people a chance to find their soul mates by freeing them of the urgings of an incessant hormonal impetus. Allow them ways to manage the beast. With that done, better, decisions can be made. People could marry for love instead of fear.

People would be able to settle for what they actually want. Think about it! Less stalkers! If they are getting some, they won't be concerned with you. In fact no one might. That means you would have to get off the couch, put away the bon-bons and make an effort to please your man or he'd just leave and not look back at your sorry ass. The relationship would have another expiry date. Just before you become common-law. Times up, pack your shit, get out.

I know it sounds cold but reason should rule. Women mature faster and guys are stupid and gullible until about 35 years old. At that age they start dealing with reality regularly. Until that time they are vulnerable. If they make it to 35 either they will be BFL or find a really fulfilling relationship with someone they respect and enjoy.


Yours

Sir RantzAlot

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